KNITTING WITHOUT DOG HAIR IS NOT AN OPTION

...and hello prescription sunglasses.

It is just not worth it at the moment to wear eye make-up. Even though there is laughter, there are also moments where I think that I am going to drown in tears and I will never have “unpuffy” eyes again. But I know it is good to go through the emotions and that I just have to go with the flow. BUT - I hate that my emotions are soooo out of control. And this is sooo hard for the German in me who likes to be in control 24/7, but I am taking a day at a time and I am trying make the best of it and trying to control as much as I can.

I am going to share a few moments from yesterday and the day before that made me laugh – which while I am typing this brings another smile to my face. Thank goodness for all these memories that carry me through this.

And at this point my apologies that the English on my blog is not going to be the high standard anymore that you are used to. One of Irwin’s many fantastic things was that he was the editor-in-chief of my knitting blog. It is time for me to stop saying Hubby. I like his name better. For example, one time Irwin decided that it would be better to write “chick flicks” instead of “girlie movies”. Which I am sure would have been entertaining to you guys, if he hadn’t changed it. ;-)

So, here is something funny that happened with Jacquie the day she picked me up at the airport while we had to wait for the locksmith to get into the house. Jacquie suggested to make some phone calls and offered me her cell phone. I don’t know if you have seen the movie “Sex and The City” or not. If not, I am going to spoil the movie for you now, sorry… Carrie’s groom – Big – doesn’t show up at the wedding and so she asks for a phone to call him. Samantha hands her an iPhone which Carrie returns immediately and says “I don't know how to work this!” Jacquie handed me her iPhone and I looked at it and had to laugh because I had no clue what to do. So, I had a “Sex and the City” moment. Poor Jacquie had to dial for me… If you know Jacquie, you know she is a gadget queen. I admire her for that. I am in many ways still so old-fashioned. I still write stuff in notebooks at work. I know, shocking.

And speaking of Jacquie – I am so grateful for all the things she started organizing and getting friends lined up for food etc. You guys are an amazing bunch. Knitters, duh!!! What else to expect, right? My SIL is vegetarian and I asked for food that she can eat as well. Which I know is hard for you Southern gals. The food from last night was really delicious - even though I am not into eating at the moment.

So, while I was gone to the airport to pick-up my SIL and her husband, Jacquie and her wonderful daughter Jessica organized that the sofa Irwin died on would be gone. When we got home, I had a new sofa in my living room. Well, it is borrowed but new for me. And then I will go shopping for a new couch when I feel like. And after all that, Jacquie made poor Jessica dust the endless shelves in my living room. Amazing ladies – I can tell you. They also took the Christmas tree down for me. Irwin wanted to do that but liked to look at the crystal ornaments we hung up last year and so we still had the tree up in June… But interestingly we were not alone with still having the tree up that late because Jessica took her tree down last weekend. She told me that it was funny when she and her friend came by to pick up the sofa. She walked in the door and passed the tree and her friend said, “Oh, look, they still have their tree up.” It was so normal for Jessica having her tree up that she didn’t even notice. Too funny…

After Jessica and Jacquie left yesterday, I had a sparkling new living room, dusted and with shampooed (!) carpets. Told you they were awesome…

Thanks to all of you at this point for all the wonderful messages, emails, voicemails, comments. It makes me feel so much better to know that I have this wonderful group of people who take care of me. It is good for me to write on the blog and let you know what is going on at the moment. THANK YOU - for reading and caring!!!

A lot of bizarre things also happened. One of them was that George Carlin died June 22 in California from heart failure. The same day as Irwin died from a heart attack. Well, Irwin's official date on the death certificate will be the 23rd because that is when he was found. But the medical examiner told me that he passed away between 12-14 hours before they found him which then would have been the 22nd. I talked to Irwin's best friend back from the cup scout days for a long time last night and he told me that Irwin was totally fond of George Carlin which I didn’t know. But thinking about it, Irwin and George Carlin’s humor was very similar at times.

We - meaning my SIL, her husband and I – also decided what to do about Irwin’s arrangements.

We were thinking about how we could possibly accommodate all the people who knew Irwin and wanted to say good-bye, which is quite a challenge because they live in Michigan, Vermont, Georgia, New York and Germany. He sure doesn’t make it easy – always a challenge that man.

Irwin’s last will was to be cremated which caused a bit of a stir on the Jewish side of the family. But there is no way that I wouldn’t honor his last wish. The cremation is today and there will be no service – at the moment. I am still too shocked and raw to deal with any kind of arrangements and more than a few people at a time. Time needs to pass for that and I also want his friends and our families to have time to absorb what happened. We are planning to sprinkle his ashes later at different locations, on his Mom’s and Grandmother’s graves in New York, somewhere in Georgia Mountains where we used to take the dogs for a hiking vacation and somewhere in the German Alps. I am think I might take him to his all-time favorite castle, Neuschwanstein. We’ll see. But one thing is for sure – Irwin who didn’t really like to travel will be travelling. He loved to be at different places but he hated to get there.

Here is another little morbid snippet. When we got to the funeral home, we waited in the reception area and my SIL said “Wow, this place is huge. They could have weddings, christenings, etc. here too.” I didn’t get her joke right away and said that it might be a little morbid to have those happy occasions at the same place as the sad ones and asked her where she read that they would do that. When she explained that is was just a joke that she made up, we started laughing and I got the evil eye from one of the elderly funeral directors. That experience makes me want to re-watch all the episodes of "Six Feet Under", one of my favorite TV shows.

Well, sleeping and eating don’t seem to be my favorite things at the moment. But at least I got about 4 hours last night. I figure I will be very tired at some point and then I am just going to sleep then.

The dogs are wonderful. Like little shadows following me around. Well, Hermione being her usual self thinks that my SIL and her husband are here to visit her and Hermione can be quite a nuisance when she is begging for attention. And I think she knows that she can get away with it at the moment. I just don’t feel like correcting her. I will never know what the dogs felt and saw when Irwin died, but I am glad they were there and he was not all alone. I know how much he loved them. Such good kiddos!

Speaking of Ms.-I-need-all-of-your-attention-now is squeezing herself between me and the laptop – literally! It’s time for the morning trip to the backyard. And I have written enough for the moment. Thanks so much for all of your thoughts – I hope I will be able to pay back all your kindness some day. Don’t ask me to knit you an afghan tho’!